Idealoveogy

I've been a romantic guy my whole life. Pre-school crush on Stacy and Trey, two of the Day Care's workers, I'd pick lilacs from the trees for them during outside playtime. Kindergarten through forth grade Amanda owned my heart, I literally chased her for years--more recess fun. But my first puppy love was in the sixth grade; and, it was the first time I was slammed with heartache. Middle school was the battle ground where my journey for love began. Unfortunately, she too soon grew tired of my poetic nature, and cute notes; and bed time stories weren't cool enough anymore. She hit me with a dream-shattering line that I thought would be the only time I'd ever hear it, seeing as it isn't really provoked by many, "You're life isn't a movie, Mike. This is real life." I'd heard stories of true love, saw it in movies, and I wanted nothing less than that, "can't eat, can't sleep, reach for the stars, over the fence, World Series kind of stuff." But here I started to learn that not everybody else wants that, and even more saddening is that not everyone could believe in that kind of love. Now ten years later, crazy as it may seem, I've heard that same exact line three times. But regardless of those I've loved and lost, and for those who didn't believe, I refuse to let go of my lifelong dream. True love exists. She's waiting for me to sweep her off her feet, and I'm waiting for her to live the dream with me.

She exists in Ms. Bennett. She refuses the idea of marriage unless it's based off crazy, head over heals love. Unfortunately in this place we live dubbed "real life" by so many cold-hearted, not everyone agrees with her. Marrying for reasons other than true love is like vehicular cosmic-magnetism. It happens. The only way you stop it from happening is to stop at every traffic sign, and look both ways carefully, fully expecting that blast out of nowhere. Because if you don't see it coming beforehand, and you don't refuse to settle for comfortableness and security, you'll find your love life a total wreck.

She exists in Bella Swan. The very reason I stand whole-hearted as a proud member of Team Edward is because of their burning desire for each other. It can be argued over Jacob and Edward who is the safer, more comfortable, more fun guy; however, it is irrefutable that Bella is passionately in love with Edward. She is unconditionally and irrevocably in love with him. That's the love I believe in.

Unfortunately, I've also walked along the other side of the line. To be the one lesser in love is almost as painful. I have had to look a girl in her teary, confused, innocent eyes, and apologize for not having a better reason for my heart not choosing her. There is no explanation for having a beautiful, smart, funny, exciting young woman throw herself at me, and have my mind tell me how perfect of a lover she would be, but my heart not respond. And I will always hope a girl can keep her faith in love, and her eyes open for her Romeo.

Love is uncontrollable. We don't consciously decide on a girl who fits all our ideal qualities in a girl. There is no check list to be completed before our heart dives in--athletic, well read, witty, cute facial expressions, check check check check, OK she's good; I can love her now. There isn't a formula, it's not a science. In fact, love is the most unexplainable, irresponsible, irrational... yet most magical aspect of humanity. Love is the reason for our creation, our purpose.


And so, despite failed attempts, strike outs, and heartaches, I remain a believer. Never settling for comfortableness or convenience, but living with hope for only the most romantic story. Sure, a "movie-like" story, a "happily ever after," a "dream come true," can become my reality. Why not? Who says it can't be so? It can happen. I can have that, "can't eat, can't sleep, reach for the stars, reach for the stars, over the fence, World Series kind of stuff." But not just for my sake, also for hers. Because she deserves nothing less than for me to ride to her, as her "knight in shining armor," on her "white horse," and treat her like the princess she is. Because we all deserve to live the fairy tale, the "happily ever after" story.